Vampire Killing Under Federal Contract

I wonder if this company (which I saw through Ryan's Facebook) is listed in the Central Contractor Registry.  And if it is, could I do a sole source justification under Federal Acquisition Regulation 6.302-1?  There can't be that many companies that do vampire killing

A Unique Motion for a Continuance

My brother passed me this motion for a continuance, which, in part, states:

Since 1972, when Darrell was but a lad of thirteen, he has been a fan of the Texas Rangers Baseball Club (hereinafter referred to as "Rangers").

You should read the whole thing as well as the footnotes, which are also very funny.

Here's a link.

http://scr.bi/bknjDF